via img856.imageshack.us I picked the wrong 12 hour period to stop drinking.
Continuing our pointless ridiculously important series to decide who is the number one poster of any time period dating back to the start of the website 2011 we come to my own matchup with the Dad of multiple Vlads.
I should not go on too long here as I figure it would be cheating, technically. Ill let my post I whipped up this morning do the talking for me. I have not seen DoV around too much recently, I hope it is only because he is preparing his post for this "bloodbath" (thanks 2pints for the apt buzzword).
I feel a lot better today and will be updating everything with link below so everyone can follow along and know whats up ahead of time. Thanks for your patience.
1 recs | 490 comments
At this point I feel as if I am reaching Brian Wilson-like over exposure which might affect my bracket success. Maybe you are tired of my posts lamenting of hangovers past, drinking too much, or generally posting too damn much.
I get it, I really do. See, what I think is the issue here is that it’s a communication problem. I think you just do not understand where I am coming from, so, cannot relate enough to tolerate my tomfoolery. Drunken debauchery comes in many forms, as do STDs…. however I am a special breed that combines both, adds baseball and sabermetrics, and sits in front of a keyboard furiously finger-molesting my keyboard until genius comes out.
Let us try to resolve this information gap as to alleviate the disparity of MYTHS of Phi Slamma (yes, I am now talking in the third person, deal with it) and FACTS of Phi Slamma:
Without further ado:
MYTH ONE
Phi Slamma is a panda, with a Mohawk, one who drinks too much and posts on HH drunk at all hours, then eats bamboo, then falls asleep on the keyboard:
(This, in fact, is not me)
FACT
Phi Slamma is an actual human being, with a Mohawk, one who drinks too much and makes horrible decisions, posts on HH drunk at some hours (but mostly sober), then eats tacos and falls asleep on the keyboard:
MYTH TWO
Phi Slamma is some kind of rebellious whippersnapper brought to Halos Heaven specifically to annoy the older gentleman (and ladies) of the site with young exuberance and troll the newer members with an overlord of snarky and condescending.
FACT
1.
Ninjas arePhi is a mammal.2.
Ninjas fightPhi posts ALL the time.3. The purpose of
the ninjais toflip out and kill people.post things that make people giggle, namely boner/fart/Prince Fielder is fat jokes.(Props to anyone who remotely knows the reference here)
MYTH THREE
Sushi is raw fishPhi Slamma sold out:
FACT
I receive no compensation for my awesomeness here. Now, because I am responsible for my posts now and Rev and I have discussed copyright law over martinis the last few days, I cannot post the "Broke Panda" picture I found on deviant art. I nearly choked on my complementary caviar when I heard I can no longer use profanities on things I post on the front page. The SB Nation massage therapist had to get me a glass of Fiji water to wash it down before I ruined my lunch. Quail is not going to eat itself, you know.
I hope this clears up a few things. Honestly, I want to save the good stuff for later on (HH willing) against the dreaded Halowood. I’m hoping you all see the potential of a Halowood vs Phi in the next round and vote accordingly.
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
The mole on that chick's right boob bothers me.
Sorry if that’s your sister/girlfriend/mother/aunt/niece.
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
It bothers me too
no apology needed.
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
I think that's something I'd probably be able to look past...
ryanfea - January 6, 2012
me too
mustard_man - January 6, 2012
Not a problem for me either
hauldog - January 6, 2012
You're right...
Nothing like fake boobs, fake hair, and fake personality (I assume).
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
Fake hair, natural everything else
and a really awesome person, actually. One of those “book does not match its cover” type things. Like a book with dragons on the cover but its really about female only tea parties to discuss gardening.
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
I stand corrected.
Again.
I feel like I should sign up under another username just to vote for you. That might make up for all my dickish comments.
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
You're 0-2 5th,
you’re going to salt lake for a few weeks.
RexTookMyStash - January 6, 2012
I know...
I just need to go to SLC and figure some things out. Work on the holes in my posts, get back to basics with my mechanics.
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
Stay within your mechanics
Clutch - January 7, 2012
me three
firebird81 - January 6, 2012
good thing she has 2 boobs then
2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
I need further evidence before agreeing with your conclusion
Commander_Nate - January 6, 2012
Comm Nate, if it wouldn't get me insta banned I would be all over it for you, broheim.
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
Now you changed your sig line, too?!
Why are you so amenable?! It isn’t fair.
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
Just email them to my haloball account.
I’ll make sure Nate gets them, and I won’t even look.
RexTookMyStash - January 6, 2012
Don't bother me
highlandhalo - January 6, 2012
NathanielS - January 6, 2012
>.>
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
Stupid gifbin
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
Damn--I was sure I'd found your aborted clones in a box my old roommate had left behind the other day
Commander_Nate - January 6, 2012
I.... I want everything in this picture
Even the People’s Mag.
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
So did I...the thing in the case on top said it flys...a f***ing FLYING ROBOT
Sadly, they all take 47 million batteries and none of them worked after at least a half hour of combined effort. Now they are just sitting there, mocking us.
Commander_Nate - January 6, 2012
I feel like a flying robot is too awesome not to work.
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
Yet another lie perpetuated by toy companies and the Chinese government
Commander_Nate - January 6, 2012
is your roommate of Asian decent?
(no racism)
2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
I beg to differ
sheisalovelyladyandmyapologiestoher - January 6, 2012
Nah
Those toys were supposed to go to some charity event way back in college which didn’t end up happening (can’t remember why now). Since then, they’d been stuck in the boxes they were shipped in deep in the depths of this huge closet we have. He left them behind when he moved and we found ’em when the rest of us decided to clean out said closet.
I kinda feel like he was lying to us for the past 2-3 years. Bastard.
Commander_Nate - January 7, 2012
win
realultimatepower.net reference gets my vote.
foxpaw - January 6, 2012
Where do you think I got my standby halloween costume for the last 8 years?
Halowitz - January 6, 2012
^^^ 1000th HH COMMENT ^^^
in just under 1 year. Here’s to many more.
and a 19th seed in next year’s bracket.
Halowitz - January 6, 2012
I am going to have to come up with something good for the selection process next year
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
Free-for-all thread
Everyone posts the most awesome ish they can come up with, no limits, no structure, just a 24-48 hour time limit. Then have another thread where everyone votes for the best posts and seed off of that and contributions over the year.
Commander_Nate - January 6, 2012
just nominate them during the season
someone/youself keep tabs on your recs comments
eyespy - January 6, 2012
I think only the mod people can track that
Plus, that sounds alarmingly similar to the title that DFA guy has in 2pints’ sig.
Commander_Nate - January 6, 2012
Just remember
to pat yourself on the back. You need to take your hands out of your pants first.
eyespy - January 6, 2012
GMTA
red floyd - January 6, 2012
I better beat pattimelt based on my sig alone
2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
But then that douchebag from AN (Designatedforassignment) will get in, based on the fact that he's one of the most rec'd posters!!!
red floyd - January 6, 2012
I am like 50 away.
And our avatars still need to battle.
NathanielS - January 6, 2012
I'm voting for you because that chick is hot.
RexTookMyStash - January 6, 2012
I think Brian Wilson's problem was over-eating, not over-exposure.
Oh wait, you’re talking about the closer.
5thStarter - January 9, 2012
There will be blood....
mattwelch - January 6, 2012
There will be blood tonight!
red floyd - January 6, 2012
Vlad jr...
I want my father back you sonofabitch
The Limey - January 6, 2012
My name is Red Floyd - prepare to die
johnnyangel101 - January 6, 2012
There will be blood.
Balls and Strikes - January 6, 2012
I drink your milkshake!
sheisalovelyladyandmyapologiestoher - January 6, 2012
Its called drainage.
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
I wanted to vote for DOV because he makes me laugh and he is here almost every day, but I really want to see what you have for Halowood
so hard to decide.
Balls and Strikes - January 6, 2012
Cue the awkwardly timed loud orchestra
hauldog - January 6, 2012
Another tough match up
I’ve gone on record with my appreciation of DOV. But Phi brings a similar level of “WTF” hilarity to HH and also manages to chip in with some actual baseball intellect from time to time. Simply a more well-rounded blogger.
Sorry DOV. You’re still awesome in my book but Phi has my vote today.
BigGame48 - January 6, 2012
+1
Phi can actually articulate his thoughts at times. But, he’s still boner-ifically hilarious
angelsownredsux - January 6, 2012
This is like the Iowa Caucuses!
Accept I’d rather have either of these fellas in the white house right now.
gitchogritchoffmypetis - January 6, 2012
----------
eyespy - January 6, 2012
AWESOME!
RexTookMyStash - January 6, 2012
DOV needs to elevate his game in one department.
MAXIMAL STRIKETHROUGHPhi is the alpha seed of strikethrough.
Turks Teeth - January 6, 2012
Hey Turk
have a pic that you want to represent you/is you?
Im going to have a lot of paint created pics up if I dont get some user submitted material.
Same goes for everyone else who has an upcoming thingy.
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
Sure, I'll send you some raw material to slay.
Turks Teeth - January 6, 2012
DOV all the way
Just compare the signature lines. Phi’s is terrible, just like his skidmark…errr…“mohawk”.
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
No offense, of course.
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
Ouch.
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
Phi, I'm a rookie here, and I do truly love you.
Your Chow pics are worth 10,000 words. I just felt like being a complete a-hole, I guess.
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
The hair style has its own story
its not as douchey as one might think. Its actually quite sad/silly.
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
In that case, I rescind my jerkish comment about your hair.
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
Mohawks are one of few options
for guys who have receding hairlines and still want to seem hip.
Rally Manatee - January 6, 2012
In addition to rescinding my jerkish comments...
I owe you a beer if we’re ever at the same Halos game together.
Kind of like a sympathy vote for going with DOV.
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
Ill get the second round
no worries.
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
It's a date!
Errr…a friendly get-together, rather.
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
No takesies backsies
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
I was hoping you'd say that.
That’s me flirting with you.
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
Insert Richard Gere hamster joke...
Right up Richard Gere’s…uh…never mind.
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
Getting Gere with me?
Tom Selick’s mustache has something to say about that.
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
Well, you win.
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
My mom is still in love with this guy.
RexTookMyStash - January 6, 2012
Tom says to go ahead and send her over.
snowhor - January 6, 2012
There is plenty of space
on the Mustache Ride Express
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
I made a slight change to my profile
you might recognize the sig I have now.
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
It's not fair, I tells ya!
You’re too damn friendly.
How about this? If it comes within one vote, you get to claim victory, because I’m officially un-voting for DOV.
Way to campaign, sir. The GOP could learn a few things from you.
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
Yeah...awesome
Hey wait…
Moondoggy - January 6, 2012
I take DOV's sig line as an homage to you.
That’s why I like it.
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
Getting them outta the way
At work …
And …
Play.
eyespy - January 6, 2012
The tumbling one made me rofl for a significant period of time.
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
so it looked exactly like the gif you were rofl'ing about?
2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
I gotta vote DOV, sorry humanity.
Because I cracked wise about his wife I feel like I owe him one.
NathanielS - January 6, 2012
Paying it forward
eyespy - January 6, 2012
PhiSlamma looks like he's about to Glee it up.
To cool for me. I’ll be bitter from afar.
NathanielS - January 6, 2012
Somehow I knew it was a bad idea to stray away from solely posting Panda pictures.
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
YUP!
Should have kept it Black and White
eyespy - January 6, 2012
racist
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
imposter
ryanfea - January 6, 2012
interloper
blast21dave - January 6, 2012
anteloper?
sheisalovelyladyandmyapologiestoher - January 6, 2012
Alter ego > Actual ego
halofan4life - January 6, 2012 via Android app
DOV is good for cheap entertainment, but PhiSamma actually has some good thoughts.
Besides, all those GIfs slow my computer down and it annoys me.
Wally's World - January 6, 2012
SOLUTION
Quit your job.
NathanielS - January 6, 2012
Bracket thread updated
Found Here
Schedules posted shortly. Ill update here throughout the day.
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
BTW, is that you drinking straight from the wine bag?
Major props if so. Have not done that since like 2008.
Commander_Nate - January 6, 2012 via Android app
That was last new years
and yeah, Space Bags are really good at:
1. Tasting delicious for exactly 13 minutes
2. Getting you all shammered
3. Getting you incredibly sick from all the sugar
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
I attempted the bag-o-wine at bowl game between UCLA and FSU at AT&T park in San Fran.
Bad bad idea. Needless to say, I missed most of the game, lost my friends, and lost my buddies cell phone.
RexTookMyStash - January 6, 2012
Have either of you done the Camelbak full of jungle juice at a big party?
That’s a fun time.
Commander_Nate - January 6, 2012
so that's why my son bought a Camelbak.....
ladybug - January 6, 2012
It really is a wonderous device
Good for many situations: combat hydration; athletics; party awesomeness; lethargy enhancement…
Commander_Nate - January 6, 2012
I used to put scotch in one to have while snowboarding.
I quit doing that in an effort to continue living.
snowhor - January 6, 2012
How's that effort going?
I’ve been considering it myself. Still doing preliminary research though.
Commander_Nate - January 6, 2012
I appear to still be alive limiting scotch on the rocks to home and the not so occasional bar.
Snowboarding is different now, though.
snowhor - January 6, 2012
Can't say I have Nate,
although it does sound tempting.
RexTookMyStash - January 6, 2012
This battle shoulda been a fanshot.
Stirrups - January 6, 2012
WINNER!!!111!!!
eyespy - January 6, 2012
Duh!
Clutch - January 7, 2012
LOL
stuck in Romania - January 7, 2012
oh man
I’m supposed to work with this going on??? shit
2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
When is the homebrew HH party?
I’m in the HB area.
BigGame48 - January 6, 2012
Torrance
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
Nice!
I’m in El Segundo. FAR WEST SIDE, REPREZZZENT!
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
thought you lived in hermosa?
2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
Moved
I think I said in one of these recent posts.
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
unfortunately I do not memorize every word you say
just 99.9999999999999% of it
2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
Im hurt
I can feel that .000000000000001 lack of effort…. in my heart.
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
GIFSoup"/>
2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
dude, still need to get shit in order in my garaje
I’m a lagger
2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
PhiSlamma
I’m sorry, DoV, too many of your GIFs have – especially those involving people of color and knives, have generated permanent retinal and neuron damage.
mustard_man - January 6, 2012
My concern is Phi picked this time to stop drinking
Whereas DOV will have driven 4000 miles in traffic today and come home to his managerie, ready his arsenal of GIFs and wish he was drinking.
steelgolf - January 6, 2012
DoV
This competition needs insanity, and DoV is certifiable
The Limey - January 6, 2012
thank you
i was hoping for the international vote
DAD OF VLAD - January 6, 2012
Well you've got south London...
…don’t expect anything from the French, they’re all diseased
The Limey - January 6, 2012
The French are all diseased?
I thought they were just cheese loving surrender monkies.
steelgolf - January 6, 2012
as much as I love you DOV, Romania votes for PHI.
Though this is for me the toughest matchup.
stuck in Romania - January 7, 2012
mustard_man - January 6, 2012
At least for gifs, try to remember to put something in the subject line so people can have the option to collapse it.
Thanks.
RexTookMyStash - January 6, 2012
sorry
mustard_man - January 6, 2012
No worried dude. :D
RexTookMyStash - January 6, 2012
worries*
RexTookMyStash - January 6, 2012
I did it to
NathanielS - January 6, 2012
Check your email.
I sent you a four page warning.
RexTookMyStash - January 6, 2012
I didn't get it.
NathanielS - January 6, 2012
I was kidding duder.
RexTookMyStash - January 6, 2012
X
red floyd - January 6, 2012
This match is tied already.
Which is cool since all the other bouts have been blow outs.
RexTookMyStash - January 6, 2012
LOL BONERS ARE HILARIOUS!!!
red floyd - January 6, 2012
Sorry, DOV... gotta go with my man Phi
red floyd - January 6, 2012
Partly because of the hot chick
red floyd - January 6, 2012
I bet PhiSlamma
has really strong opinions about Blink-182
NathanielS - January 6, 2012
He leaves them roses by the stairs
Commander_Nate - January 6, 2012 via Android app
Suprises let them know he cares
NathanielS - January 6, 2012
Say it aint so
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
Carry me home?
RexTookMyStash - January 6, 2012
I mean, I will not go.
RexTookMyStash - January 6, 2012
You f***ed up my life!
Commander_Nate - January 6, 2012
Damn, bro
did I do something to you or something? All this unbridled hate from you…. I just…. I dont know.
Also, I wrote you a four page email about Blink 182, check your email.
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
No, I think youre great, really
NathanielS - January 6, 2012
Is didn't get it.
Clueless guy is clueless.
NathanielS - January 6, 2012
If I were to hate, I would've gone the Pennywise route, simply due to your hometown area.
Mayheminthehood - January 6, 2012
Post the e-mail
It’s lookin’ like one of those doldrums afternoons here at my desk.
Plus, there was a time when I kind of modeled my life after Mark Hoppus.
Commander_Nate - January 6, 2012
I think you and I need better jobs
I waste so much time on HH
NathanielS - January 6, 2012
if you had a better job
no more HH
this is one of the reasons why i am no this site and not working
DAD OF VLAD - January 6, 2012
I've thought this too
But nobody I’ve applied to seems to think so.
Commander_Nate - January 6, 2012
I've noticed you posting on Badass Digest too
same name and pic. I’m stalking you…
2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
I do, good critisism.
NathanielS - January 6, 2012
yeah, I like that site
not everything on it is for me, but there’s enough to keep me going back. I don’t comment though, just read the articles.
2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
They are a thinned skin lot
HH is my internet find of the last year. 98% of you people are pretty awesome.
NathanielS - January 6, 2012
Gee thankes
What part of the two percent is me?
eyespy - January 6, 2012
1% is you.
The other is my hiked up, rice bag swim trunks on Fremont St.
Mayheminthehood - January 6, 2012
Yessssssssss
my percents are half empty
eyespy - January 6, 2012
If you joined, then purposed a Longoria trade RIGHT OUT OF THE GATE
You are the two percent.
NathanielS - January 6, 2012
proposed
NathanielS - January 6, 2012
I don't feel special any more
eyespy - January 6, 2012
Or if you are a LSB/LL/AN/OTM troll
Commander_Nate - January 6, 2012
Josie Wales
Is the two percent
NathanielS - January 6, 2012
so jealous you've got time today
I’m f****ing buried at work. fml
2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
Mark >>>> Tom
Halowitz - January 6, 2012
After he jumped off the deep end 5-6 years back, I kinda agree
Commander_Nate - January 6, 2012
I think Nate needed better roled modeleds.
The NSYNC of punk/Best Spork cover band ever?
You sir have always been better than that.
gitchogritchoffmypetis - January 6, 2012
Gateway band
Probably never would have gotten into BR and all the stuff I’ve listened to for the last 10+ years without them. Definitely wouldn’t have picked up a guitar. Plus, their first 3-4 albums are still pretty sweet.
Commander_Nate - January 6, 2012
^ This ^
halofan4life - January 6, 2012 via Android app
I would agree
The new one is pretty good too..
b0rd3rline - January 7, 2012
I just found this on my computer and it made me lawl:
RexTookMyStash - January 6, 2012
Maddox!
Teixeira Who? - January 6, 2012
Nice catch.
RexTookMyStash - January 6, 2012
wait to vote people until i have time to get drunk and
write my post
epic post and will use no gifs
DAD OF VLAD - January 6, 2012
I already voted DOV.
Me so solly.
RexTookMyStash - January 6, 2012
Stirrups, he of Big Voting Thumbs, standing by...
Stirrups - January 6, 2012
LOL BONERS ARE HILARIOUS
red floyd - January 6, 2012
I am waiting until at least tomorrow
this is going to be epic.
steelgolf - January 6, 2012
I await your shameless self promotion DOV.
And will not vote until then.
halofolife - January 6, 2012
Dude, I thought you were drunk all the time
Big Easy Halofan - January 6, 2012
Me too.
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
not the case
never around the kids
o beer during dinner but once i put the kids down and washed the dishes then BAM beer in hand and trolling the AL WEST
DAD OF VLAD - January 8, 2012
So for us, that would have been all the time
in the sense that we never saw you on here unless you were in beer mode.
opiejeanne - January 8, 2012
I haven't voted yet.
I’ve been away all day, smuggling dogs across international borders, and now I’m trying to wade through this thread and PEOPLE KEEP POSTING WHILE I’M TRYING TO READ IT, DAMMIT!
Nate, how are we going to top this?
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
Cookies and beer
Commander_Nate - January 6, 2012
dude CommNate
did you see what i got for xmas????
2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
DUDE
That’s the same exact kit I got. From the same place too. Did I send you the link way back? Are you stalking me?
Commander_Nate - January 6, 2012
haha, yeah you sent me that link like 9 months ago
been thinking about it ever since. my mom’s business has been booming so I went the shameless route and basically told her to buy it for me, and she did. stoked!
I need to make some room in my garage, build some surf racks and what not, then I’ll start messing around with it. once I’m at that point (hopefully just a week or 2 away) I’ll let you know so we can bro down about it and you can give me some tips.
2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
For sure
I haven’t been doing it as often the place 6+ months or so, but I have a bit left from the batch I made end of Oct/early Nov. Haven’t had the time to dedicate to taking it further.
What recipe did you go with for your first batch?
Commander_Nate - January 6, 2012
to be honest I don't even know
like I said, my mom bought it for me (no I’m not a mama’s boy, I swear). its still in the boxes it came in, I didn’t want to open them until I was ready to set shit up. knowing my mom she probably just went with the default, which is the golden ale. seems like a decent one to start with.
what’re your favorites so far that you’ve brewed? I like all beers but have been digging pale ales and IPAs lately.
2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
The past couple of times I've made my own recipe
It’s a red ale that I think I’ve gotten down pretty good. Generally I prefer heavier stuff (IPAs/Reds, Stouts). That place has an American Pale Ale recipe that was pretty good. Their Honey Wheat is also pretty delicious and easy to make if you’re going for something lighter.
Commander_Nate - January 7, 2012
I'll bake and you can brew?
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
OK PEOPLE, LISTEN UP!
We need everyone’s addresses where you live so we can mail your bribes.
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
How 'bout cookiebeer?
Commander_Nate - January 6, 2012
You know what? We should join up and take over this contest.
Totally.
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
I haven't voted yet, so I'll wait to see what you post.
I’ve been away all day, smuggling dogs across international borders, and now I’m trying to wade through this thread and PEOPLE KEEP POSTING WHILE I’M TRYING TO READ IT, DAMMIT!
Nate, how are we going to top this?
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
By going head to head TWICE!
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
Do I know you from somewhere?
Are you one of my kids? Or maybe one of my cousins?
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
I'm your father.
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
Bwahahaha! Unless you're 93, I sort of doubt that.
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
Hmmm.
I can’t keep this charade going any longer. I’m not your father.
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
5thStarter.... You are NOT the father!
sheisalovelyladyandmyapologiestoher - January 6, 2012
OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
YEAH! I TOLD YOU GIRL! YOU KNOW THIS!
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
Where's the elusive DOV pic? Show yourself!!!!! Preferably something embarrassing.
Mayheminthehood - January 6, 2012
ask
sheisalovelyladyandblahblah he has met me
or search there is a picture some where
DAD OF VLAD - January 6, 2012
Do you have pics of you with bleached blonde bimbos?
I have yet to vote, and that will only help your case.
Mayheminthehood - January 6, 2012
no
i dont live in LA
DAD OF VLAD - January 6, 2012
Only thing I can find is what I believe to be your LinkedIn profile pic. You're holding one of your kids in it.
Classy.
Mayheminthehood - January 6, 2012
ya that is me
i am the one behind the camera most of the time
DAD OF VLAD - January 6, 2012
he's got an Ervin Santana beard
and kinda looks like Abe Lincoln. at least that was a pic that he posted last year.
2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
So he's Cousin Mose from The Office?
Mayheminthehood - January 6, 2012
Very close likeness
except cousin Mose can’t drive. DOV wishes he didn’t have to drive.
steelgolf - January 6, 2012
so true
DAD OF VLAD - January 6, 2012
finger to nose
2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
He's Mike Schur, produce and writer of The Office and P&R?
AlanFalcon - January 8, 2012
No, DOV produces children
and presents GIFs. And his chin beard is slighty thinner. I think he is trying to be pseudo Amish.
steelgolf - January 10, 2012
That was not gender specific
NathanielS - January 6, 2012
This comment is full of win.
RexTookMyStash - January 6, 2012
I found it already:
RexTookMyStash - January 6, 2012
hell no
DAD OF VLAD - January 6, 2012
my love stalker INKARA
the Bakersfield Gigolo himself!!!!
Rev Halofan - January 6, 2012
I was hoping someone remembered.
RexTookMyStash - January 6, 2012
Ew.
I remember that guy too.
That was hard to forget.
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
Hurrrrr Durrrrrr
snowhor - January 6, 2012
Tough vote.
This seems like it should have been a matchup for a later round, though Phil vs. Halowood was fun once and should be again.
snowhor - January 6, 2012
It's less fun with Halowood not here to embarass himself
ryanfea - January 6, 2012
I actually have a diabolical plan for that matchup which should be hilarious
But since this vote is so close, I have no idea if that is going to happen. This is ridiculous, such a nail biter.
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
Waiting patiently for DOV's response to Phi.
angelslogic - January 6, 2012
Im already planning a full blown panda-laced counterattack
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
way too close to call
but Phi got my vote merely because he created the opportunity to vote
ladybug - January 6, 2012
Wow, very close right now -- voted for the mowhawk because of the mowhawk
Waiting for a smattering of GIFs from DOV…
Big Easy Halofan - January 6, 2012
I just had a thought
what if he has a mega post with GIFs that… that are all pandas.
Is that like dividing by zero? What would happen?
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
The Earth is immediately sucked into an astral plane...
…and we all turn into pandas.
Big Easy Halofan - January 6, 2012
Not racist enough for DOV.
Mayheminthehood - January 6, 2012
What if it were unnatural albino Pandas
whose sole mission in life is to eliminate bi-colored pandas due to pure, unadulterated racism of the Albino Pandarian race?
What then Mayhem?
Huh?
Yeah thought so.
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
DOV....did you lose this?
ladybug - January 6, 2012
ladybug is not even in this matchup and she has just taken a commanding lead
time to get busy DOV, you are being pummeled.
steelgolf - January 6, 2012
The silent shall be broken
ladybug - January 6, 2012
HA!
+1
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
I suspect the first round upset is going to be 'Bug trashing CKOD.
red floyd - January 6, 2012
sweet little ol' me???
ladybug - January 6, 2012
is that an upset?
in my mind bug was a shoe in
2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
According to the seeding, yeah, it would be.
red floyd - January 6, 2012
No way.
I’m campaigning hard for CKOD.
Much love to ladybug, but my boy CKOD is the ish!
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
you just cemented my vote for bug
2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
My recommendation is that toxic?
Ouch.
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
hey!!
ladybug - January 6, 2012
Much love!
I swear!
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
How to win friends
and influence people.
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
With money?
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
You're in pretty deep already....
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
That's what she said?
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
You just wish.
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
Wait, am I really offending you right now?
If so, I apologize.
I just like CKOD.
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
I'm difficult to offend in this manner, so no apologies necessary.
And Bug’s my pal.
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
partner in crime!!
ladybug - January 6, 2012
Every time.
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
Phew.
Didn’t want to ruffle your feathers.
Same goes for you, ladybug!
I hope to get to know you both better at some point!
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
Buk-Buk-Buk-BukKAW
eyespy - January 6, 2012
Why are you dancing?
You know I tried to give you my slot?
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
Hey, I come with my tail between my legs.
I’m new, I just want to make friends!
I’m so lonely…
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
that's us....friend to the friendless
ladybug - January 6, 2012
..
sheisalovelyladyandmyapologiestoher - January 6, 2012
saying "I'm new" only works the first 300 times you use it
I’d say that excuse is just about over with
2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
Thanks for pulling me back from the brink
I was about to bake him some violin-shaped cookies.
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
please still make some!!
ladybug - January 6, 2012
Hahaha! Maybe when I hit SoCal again.
I swear, I’d leave now if I could.
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
you wouldn't like it here
its been 80 degrees all week. it blows
2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
My cabin is in Blue Jay.
So more like high 50s, but it’s got sunlight! I crave me some vitamin D
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
I'm new, and sorry too
Now where’s me cookies
eyespy - January 6, 2012
Oh please.
You were here before me.
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
Aha!
So that’s why you don’t like me.
Well, at least I can put that to rest.
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
It's not that we don't like you.
We don’t know you yet.
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
It's not that we don't like you
you haven’t bought us a drink yet.
One word: Vegas
ladybug - January 6, 2012
What if I were to write a new fanpost about trading for David Wright?
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
only if includes a three way for Longo
eyespy - January 6, 2012
5 way dry
ladybug - January 6, 2012
who said I didn't like you?
I love all of
God’sAngel’s creatures2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
Eh.
Just a vibe. No worries.
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
You know, I'm like, really well respected on other blogs, right?
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
How would that sway us,
since this blog is made of AWESOME!
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
Yes we is
eyespy - January 6, 2012
Let me guess... you've been rec'd more than anyone on AN except for Designatedforassignment
red floyd - January 6, 2012
You will know when they don't like you
Believe it.
eyespy - January 6, 2012
You like me, don'tcha?
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
Believe it
eyespy - January 6, 2012
~sniff~sniff~ I thought I was the only one
ladybug - January 6, 2012
Nah, he called me a Mean Girl
because I deserved it.
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
A regular Andrew Carnegie
Moondoggy - January 6, 2012
Well, he did build some libraries for the common people
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
prolly not
you were supposed to correct me by saying “Dale Carnegie” then I would respond that he’s doing it with money…sheeze, you make a terrible straight man
Moondoggy - January 6, 2012
George and Gracie=Doggy & Opie
ladybug - January 6, 2012
They say the same thing about me.
Except, I don’t think they mean it the same way as you do.
sheisalovelyladyandmyapologiestoher - January 6, 2012
D'oh!!!!
Say goodnight Gracie.
Goodnight Gracie.
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
see?? If you really knew me, you'd know the correct answer is Racer 5 or some equivalent IPA
ladybug - January 6, 2012
Hahahaha!
Inconceivable!
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
Panda Porn
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5nmq2z4yuZs
NathanielS - January 6, 2012
I don't know...
The mole on that one panda’s right boob kind of bothers me.
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
thought that was it's butt cheek
ladybug - January 6, 2012
Either way, I'm bothered.
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
The lag in a retaliatory strike from DoV has me waiting, lurking.
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
I don't know why the vote is so close
PhiSlamma should be walking away with this easily. No offense DOV, but Phi is at an entirely higher level.
Maybe two. Possibly more.
WiHaloFan - January 6, 2012
Zombie Phi-Panda agrees
ladybug - January 6, 2012
'bug is killing it today.
Gearing up for her showdown, most likely.
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
That's when she's gonna bust out her pin-up girl pics.
Mayheminthehood - January 6, 2012
WiHaloFan - January 6, 2012
Michelle Bachmann?
mustard_man - January 6, 2012
Michelle wishes she looked that good.
Not too mention intelligent.
halofolife - January 6, 2012
My Cod, look at the goiter on that one.
Take yer meds Mamie, yer eyes is buggin’ out again!
What the heck did they do to treat thyroid disease back then, aside from locking the women in the attic? Ground up essence of sheep’s thyroid or something?
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
iodine
ladybug - January 6, 2012
Oh yeah, huh.
But isn’t there a point where it doesn’t work so great?
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
I think back then, pretty much everything didn't work so great.
hell, handwashing wasn’t popular until the mid 1800’s
ladybug - January 6, 2012
scarves
Moondoggy - January 6, 2012
shhhhhhhh, that was supposed to be a secret
ladybug - January 6, 2012
Obviously DOV made an account for each of his kids and is stuffing the ballot box.
Approves:
RexTookMyStash - January 6, 2012
And you better not have a problem with it
Commander_Nate - January 6, 2012
DOV is comedic foil to HH, his GIFS have made me dumber and caused me vertigo symptoms.
Yet, I shall cast mine vote his way. He is OUR Alan/Zach Galifianakis, and we’re darned proud to have him.
PieceOfAase - January 6, 2012
I can't vote for DOV, if only because of his fantasy football league.
I think he went to the settings page, had one of his babies mash down on the keyboard, and whatever came of that ended up being the rules/settings/scoring for the year. Fantasy football is too serious for that kind of crap.
Mayheminthehood - January 6, 2012
All the more reason to vote for DOV
PieceOfAase - January 6, 2012
I need a method to the madness.
Plus, I hate kids.
Mayheminthehood - January 6, 2012
I wonder if you saying "I hate kids"
will generate the same backlash as when people said they hated cats. me thinks not, which is sad
2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
I don't REALLY hate kids, I guess. I mean, I love my nieces and nephew to death.
Kids, to me, are like telling people about a dream you had the night before, or what your fantasy team did over the weekend: if it aint mine, then I really don’t give a F.
Mayheminthehood - January 6, 2012
I'll send you mine so you can really, REALLY be sure about your feelings. True friends sacrifice that way
ladybug - January 6, 2012
He can have mine!
red floyd - January 6, 2012
no way
I
sacrificedoffered firstladybug - January 6, 2012
These are the truest words ever spoken
BigGame48 - January 6, 2012
Children are like farts
You can barely stand you own
Moondoggy - January 6, 2012
amen, bruthahhh
ladybug - January 6, 2012
I think people are voting for DOV just to fuck with us.
RexTookMyStash - January 6, 2012
Man, this is brutal.
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
dude, its tied 39 to 39 right now
I guess DOV has more fans than I thought…which just shows how sick some of the people who frequent this place truly are.
2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
Truer words, hath not been spoken.
RexTookMyStash - January 6, 2012
Make that 40-39 DOV!
I feel like Clarence Thomas casting the deciding vote in the 2000 election.
sheisalovelyladyandmyapologiestoher - January 6, 2012
DOV is extremely popular for some reason
Either that or everyone has sympathy for his wife giving birth to 996 children
ryanfea - January 6, 2012
Funny thing is
DOV’s dad is the crazy one.
Found that out during last year’s doubleheader in Oakland.
sheisalovelyladyandmyapologiestoher - January 6, 2012
997 children.
Get it right ryanfea. No wonder you’ve been banned numerous times.
halofolife - January 6, 2012
Sorry Boss...
Forgot the last one, won’t happen again
ryanfea - January 6, 2012
PHISLAMMA
Quick question, so I can make sure I follow the rules when it’s my turn…
Thought you were only allowed to post ONCE in the thread that you were competing in— no replies were allowed..
If so, you just blew your own rules..
pattimelt - January 6, 2012
Ah, yeah, I forgot to change that rule.
That rule, I found, was pointless. Ill make that change asap.
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
-------------------SCHEDULE---------------------
First round matchups through this month, check it out here
PhiSlamma - January 6, 2012
I didn't see mai name
Did you make an error?
eyespy - January 6, 2012
No, but mai name isn't there, but mai tai is.
red floyd - January 6, 2012
Cheers!
eyespy - January 6, 2012
I see the matchups, but not a schedule.
What am I doing wrong?
Stirrups - January 6, 2012
breathing? heart contractions?
ladybug - January 6, 2012
That's probably it. Gotta stop breathing.
Stirrups - January 6, 2012
Ok. Time's up. DOV defaults on his mega-post.
Phi takes my vote, if for no other reason than Panda-Power.
Stirrups - January 6, 2012
dude i just got home
DAD OF VLAD - January 6, 2012
And I'm headed out. Friday night beckons!
So much tequila. Such little glasses. Our goal, ladies and gentlemen, is to survive all the way to tequila pancakes…
Stirrups - January 6, 2012
have one, or two, or three for me. Lots of limes please
ladybug - January 6, 2012
DOV MEGA EPIC POST - PhiSlamma can have the blonds becasue i will have the redheads
Today was busy at work so i have not had a real chance to write something down.
finally home and with my second Carlsberg Elephant (Denmark votes i get) in hand i feel ready to type.
HISTORY
&
i found the site by pure chance. before i had many angels websites but never angelswin.com (pricks) but once i came here i visited everyday. I really did not join until a year later due in large part to my lack of cool name idea.
Other ideas: J-Dub, NAP Attack, LOL BONERS
But i had my first son Vlad and I got my name DAD OF VLAD
I was a big Vladdy G fan but a bigger GA fan. we are both lazy
Evidence to my
greatnessok-ness.1) my ban from Lesbo Star Ball
one post and banned
2) The comments in this post
3) Most deleted comments ever for HH
4) Most warning without a ban
5) The day Napoli was traded and my talk with Jessie the movie star
6) My cute kids
7) i was on TV Twice
8) i may be know as the great gifer but i still remember the little people.
CONCLUSION
I may not be big in stats but i never liked stats i am a big fan of heart and x-factor that is why we won in 2002. I am getting a nice buzz now and sitting next to the heater is nice ya. TEXAS sucks balls and the A’s stands for Ass wipes of the Angels.
I know the only great post i had was about my shitty job but i feel that all of you are my family and thanks for the great times and helping me past time at my work.
DAD OF VLAD - January 6, 2012
GOD I LOVE CHRISTINA HENDRICKS!!!!!
2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
I'm assuming you didn't win the showcase????
2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
that is right
it was my doppleganger
DAD OF VLAD - January 6, 2012
DOV straight layin' his case out!
Now I remember why I voted for you (then took it back and gave it to Phi)!
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
I pour two Guinness (Guinnii?) and this post goes up...this is a good start to the night
Commander_Nate - January 6, 2012
Where's your daughter? I only count two kids, and I know you've got at least one more.
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
Our family Christmas Card
DAD OF VLAD - January 6, 2012
Yay! Ok, I think you got even MY vote.
How’s that?
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
SUCKER!!!!
2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
Yeah, maybe.
It’s really a hard choice for me, if you remember how DOV and I started our acquaintance.
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
how was that?
DAD OF VLAD - January 6, 2012
You posted your first several, awful, obnoxious posts
in a game thread. I asked if anyone had seen Dono, and you screamed (in caps) BASEBALL ONLY!!!!
or a facsimile thereof.
I think you were drunk
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
come on
i bet if we met in person you would like me
as long as we kept it about baseball
DAD OF VLAD - January 6, 2012
You can't keep it about baseball, so just shut up.
And I like you sometimes now, but back then it was pretty damned rude, since I was asking about a member of HH.
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
where is Dono
i was wondering that early today?
DAD OF VLAD - January 6, 2012
Is that my cue?
I thought the guy only showed up on game threads, already lit up.
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
he only shows up during game threads?
DAD OF VLAD - January 7, 2012
BASEBALL ONLY!!!!!!
red floyd - January 6, 2012
Angrier next time.
Try DOV’s knife-wielding woman gif next time.
(At least I think it was a woman)
sheisalovelyladyandmyapologiestoher - January 6, 2012
I do not
please fill me in
2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
See above.
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
Vlad is pissed
but Finnegan (hopefully I remembered that right) looks pretty happy
2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
Vlad was upset he could not finish Cars 2 for the 100th time
and finn was full from a bottle of warm milk
DAD OF VLAD - January 6, 2012
Buzzed and Bummed
eyespy - January 6, 2012
Greatest kid names ever.
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
other name we liked
Mia, Antonina, Maximilian, Lincoln, Aldo,
DAD OF VLAD - January 6, 2012
All good, too!
5thStarter - January 6, 2012
my daugther is Mia
Frank158369 - January 6, 2012
Why so serious?
eyespy - January 6, 2012
he is like that
DAD OF VLAD - January 6, 2012
I guess ...
someone in the family has to be
eyespy - January 6, 2012
ha!
2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
i know i am not
DAD OF VLAD - January 6, 2012
A very handsome lad.
all of your kids are adorable
LanaBanana - January 6, 2012
fo sho
eyespy - January 6, 2012
Why is he sweating?
he looks like a young Nathan Therm in that picture.
steelgolf - January 7, 2012
he was playing in a fountain in downtown disney
DAD OF VLAD - January 7, 2012
respect for the carlsberg. respect.
DanishThunder - January 7, 2012
It is a great beer
but very little respect in the states
i dont know why
hard to find in liqueur stores i get mine at my local BevMo traveling 10 miles out of my way to get it
DAD OF VLAD - January 8, 2012
Don't touch my Carlsberg!!!
red floyd - January 8, 2012
woa that's dedication, you must have some viking warrior in you.
when i’ll be going to AZ in march they better have some carlsberg or tuborg in stock. no offense, but i’m not keen with american beers. unless if corona counts?
DanishThunder - January 9, 2012
go to a BevMO
they are the only place i can find it near me
DAD OF VLAD - January 9, 2012
cool, got that noted. i hope there wont be an issue buying alcohol since i'm only 20.
DanishThunder - January 10, 2012
might be an issue
but give a homeless man $20 bucks to walk in and get it for you and let him keep the change
DAD OF VLAD - January 10, 2012
damn, that might do the trick. what about drinking at the stadium?
is it really something cops make a deal out of?
DanishThunder - January 10, 2012
if you can grow some good facial hair
you might not get carded
the first time i was carded i was married with a new born and 23 years old
and i bought a cooking wine
DAD OF VLAD - January 10, 2012
wow, that's ridiculous!
its all very strange to me, coming from a culture which is founded on beer and has a legal drinking age af 16. but hey, what do i know.
DanishThunder - January 10, 2012
21 is the drinking age
remember America at one time banned Acholoh sales of any kind for like 12 years and some states sell anything more then beer at state owned stores and some states dont sell on sundays or after 1pm
DAD OF VLAD - January 10, 2012
DOV
for (surprisingly) not triggering the spam flag.
On a side note, I hated your ass for over a year.
Took me awhile to see the awesome that was hidden underneath all that crap.
You have my vote.
blast21dave - January 6, 2012
wow. hated? really????
2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
Well, maybe not hate
but seriously annoyed the shit out of me would be more like it.
blast21dave - January 6, 2012
He did have his moments.
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
Wow. I had no idea you looked so much like Drew Carey!
Stirrups - January 7, 2012
I can only rec Hendiricks once?
Seems wrong somehow…..
NathanielS - January 7, 2012
Awaiting Retaliation
mustard_man - January 6, 2012
only panda not in a cage but should be
never see him and Phi at the sametime
DAD OF VLAD - January 6, 2012
This battle should be on Pay Per View or something
How is it free?
Teixeira Who? - January 6, 2012
Internet streaming
I would give you the link, but that sort of action is frond upon on this site, and could get me banned.
eyespy - January 6, 2012
i fight dirty
DAD OF VLAD - January 6, 2012
The Great Gifer will always get my vote!
You cool and your pop is very feisty.
sheisalovelyladyandmyapologiestoher - January 6, 2012
Ohhhh, and he comes out with the Bollywood martial arts GIF
that is very strong.
steelgolf - January 7, 2012
What a roller coaster ride this thing is
First one easy — Johnsamo gone before I joined (or was paying attention). Halowood was a revelation as to what a truly terrible blogger can do to a thread. Admittedly, I was a blogosphere neophyte, but I had no idea how many unstable people let everything hang out for the world to see.
Second one tortuous — Mayheminthehood is one of the uber-coolest people I’ve ever met. He’s the kind of person I want to hang out with in the vain hope that a tiny fraction of his coolness will rub off on me (note to self…it never does). But every time Red signs on to a game thread, his wit and rocket scientist-quick response to pop culture references amaze and make smile. Truth? I should have abstained (but as my ex-wife and eldest child knows, it’s not in my nature).
Third one easy — Canard is witty, articulate and insightful. But Matt Welch is Mattwelch. It just wasn’t difficult for me.
Now — difficult again — Phi’s nihilistic charge into self-destruction is epic to behold. The fact that he brings us along for the ride is enthralling. Kinda like passing an automobile accident at night with the flares abounding and gurneys with sheet covered bodies waiting for transport — you just cannot look away. DOV, on the other hand, is like my experience with beer. The first sip of my Dad’s beer was nasty bitter and I proclaimed that this was a once in a lifetime experience (could be his choice in brand…back then, you could by the economy size of Brew 102 — that’s my folks, people, 102 and wine in a bag. Scotch? “Son, the Chivas is for when important people come over, pour me three fingers of the Sav-on.”). But as many other things, it was an acquired taste, such that even 30 years after my last glass of the stuff, the memory lingers, fondly. Such as it is with DOV, the distaste has morphed into fondness. I laugh when his posts hit now, and I say to myself, “What an idiot.” He has become a guilty pleasure that I cannot deny.
My vote to DOV
Moondoggy - January 6, 2012
thank you bro
DAD OF VLAD - January 6, 2012
Poetry, Moondoggy
You have my vote.
When is your seed?
LanaBanana - January 6, 2012
his seed was sown a long time ago
ladybug - January 6, 2012
ar ar
Moondoggy - January 6, 2012
it was funny, admit it
ladybug - January 6, 2012
O
kay
Moondoggy - January 6, 2012
fine, dammit. I'll buy you one of those unleaded beers in Vegas
ladybug - January 6, 2012
Ew.
Beer is bad enough, but the fake beer? I don’t see the point at all.
I’ll take a nice cider over beer, even Lambic although that stuff’s pretty good.
opiejeanne - January 6, 2012
Ha!
LanaBanana - January 6, 2012
dunno
It’s against George, though. I’m gonna get annihilated, like Canard annihilated. To be honest when Vongveng (Moondoggy, Jr.) pointed out to me that I was in the bracket, I was astonished.
Moondoggy - January 6, 2012
DOV might win this whole fucking thing
ryanfea - January 6, 2012
Phi going out in the first would be like Duke losing to Cal State Northridge..
RexTookMyStash - January 6, 2012
if it happens I'm going to be super bummed
really wanted to see Phi vs Halowood. no offense DOV
2pintsofbooze - January 6, 2012
I feel snubbed from the bracket for absolutely no
logical reason. All I know is this nonsense is classic and kills the time til Spring.
autry's cowboys - January 6, 2012 via mobile
I picked the wrong 12 hour period to stop sniffing glue
btw don’t ever try to google image search for this. It will make you want to cry every tear you have.
Halowitz - January 6, 2012
This matchup has made me neglect the rest of the site
And any other news for that matter. We signed cantu? Whatever…
Sorbo182 - January 6, 2012 via mobile
Count me amongst the many, obnoxiously, undecided voters.
I still don’t know how to vote. Phi’s posts are often hilarious, borderline manic in their style. DOV is like that annoying hanger on, that at first impression, is utterly disdainful, but after a while, becomes almost welcomed. I really am torn. Not sure how i’m gonna cast my vote….
halofolife - January 6, 2012
Came down to who I want to see take on halowood
While dov is amazing, phi vs halowood is what this is all about. Vote phi
Balls and Strikes - January 7, 2012 via mobile
Screw Whats The Matter With Kansas...im writing a new book called Whats The Matter With Halos Heaven.
Itll be about the community which feeds off of the baseball welfare in the form of intelligent, thoughtful, poignant, breaking Angels news…the best in the biz. But when it comes time to hit the polls, they vote for the candidate who seemingly goes against all that helps them; someone who, lets face it, would be most at home at Lone Star Ball out of any of us, regardless of his current standing at said site(being banned there after one comment, to me, means it took one to know one and he was among kindred, inane spirits).
Im fighting for Phi because he’s probably getting some skank at Madame Wongs right now while DOV makes his late-night voting surge, predicated on his ability to have kids, which as Bill Hicks once said, is “no more a miracle than eating food and a turd coming out of your ass.”
God help all of you.
Mayheminthehood - January 7, 2012 via mobile
Quit waffling, Mayhem
Tell us what you really think
Moondoggy - January 7, 2012
DOV is ok, too, in this matchup but Phi has brought the ruckus more often and usually with more originality.
DOV makes me laugh, too, but I get worried its for the wrong reasons…like the fact that he simultaneously has the shortest posts/comments on here AND is the leader in the clubhouse when it comes to grammatical/spelling errors. Not an easy feat.
To be honest, now that im not drinking, I’m not sure I could do more than five minutes hanging with either guy. Just too much.
Mayheminthehood - January 7, 2012 via mobile
Note his sig
I may be write behind him in the grammatical/typo pool
Moondoggy - January 7, 2012
I'm currently wearing a tshirt with you on it.
You can do no wrong.
Mayheminthehood - January 7, 2012 via mobile
*too much partying.
Mayheminthehood - January 7, 2012 via mobile
Madame Wongs is still open?
How about the Honk Kong cafe? have not been around there since the mid 80s
steelgolf - January 7, 2012
He's not at Madame Kimay' Philipino Palace?
I’ve wiped entire civilizations off my stomach with a gym sock!
Halowitz - January 7, 2012
Goddamn
I love you sir.
PhiSlamma - January 10, 2012 via Android app
I came close to banning PHI and DOV a few times
What they share is a collective case of the “I DON GIVE NO FUCK ABOUT IT, REV, JUST BRING ON THE BUZZ” that makes banning useless. They have both graced our understanding of what it means to be a fan with a reminder that to be a fan you kinda have to get in touch with you bullying drunken ballbuster who is too smart to get caught by the security guard.
Tough vote here. PHI gets points form coming up with this brilliant series but what about the time DOV posted about why he hates his job?
Rev Halofan - January 7, 2012
Rev, it was a tough call for me (as stated above)
I could have easily went with Phi, because he is brilliant in an anarchistic, nihilistic fashion and, in my relatively safe, crashing through middle age, existence, I get to live the danger vicariously. But simply put, DOV makes me laugh. At this particular point in my life, the escape of laughter gives me a greater return, than vicarious drama infused with humor. That’s it. Could have gone one way, went the other
Person preference, Mayhem
Moondoggy - January 7, 2012
This is way harder than I thought
I waited outta respect for both to make their “offical” post, even though I have my own personal bias (panda slippers are comfy, sue me, bro!).
Then DOV made his post while I got increasingly hammered. Plus, he gave us this awesome reaction to a certain trade.
I dunno how to do it…you guys vote for me and I’ll check it the morning.
Commander_Nate - January 7, 2012
That's the first time I've watched that.
Im now blowing coffee out of my nose. However, what makes this particularly difficult is Phi’s MLB The Show fantasy lineup season sim. Enter link here….
This is like choosing which underprivileged orphan to adopt….but not really.
autry's cowboys - January 7, 2012 via mobile
there is a follow up
the trade to texas
DAD OF VLAD - January 7, 2012
Amen
Let us pause to celebrate that deep in the beating heart of the Great Panther in the Sky lies some mainline connection to bro-hawk random WTF tweakage that flows strong in so many here, and very strong in the two gentlemen in question. This is a brutal first-round fight. I’m gonna straight puss out and vote for the bro who’s in 2nd place, because I want this thing to be a tie.
mattwelch - January 7, 2012
Checking in from my vacation in Australia to vote for this one.
Tough call.
DOV always makes me laugh, but Phi has been one of my favorite posters, if not the favorite, since I started reading Halos Heaven regularly 2 years ago.
The mix of wit, comedy, debauchery, and baseball is brilliant.
Plus the Fan Post on Epic Sax Guy was one of the greatest things ever. I still start humping air when I hear a similar sax tune!
Gotta go with Phi!
Persi W - January 7, 2012 via mobile
I am so guilty of sax related air humpage too. Every time.
PhiSlamma - January 10, 2012 via Android app
There's too much sax and violins going here.
red floyd - January 10, 2012
I have the strangest boner right now.
PhiSlamma - January 10, 2012 via Android app
LOL BONERS ARE HILARIOUS!
5thStarter - January 10, 2012
as long as
all of DOV’S kids don’t get a vote. Phi should def have it
YOUknowulovetheIE - January 7, 2012 via mobile
Kids.
I enjoy reading both posters. So I sit here grasping for something to differentiate the two. And I settle for this: Family. Since DOV will soon have his own show, “35 Kids and Counting,” he needs to go on to the next round. Point DOV.
angelslogic - January 7, 2012
One of the first things I thought when I woke up today:
LOL BONERS ARE HILARIOUS!!!
I take that as a sign.
Commander_Nate - January 7, 2012
Morning boners are especially hilarious.
Halowitz - January 7, 2012 via mobile
especially when you gotta whizz!
Downing Rules - January 7, 2012
I've perfected the ol' tripod stance
2pintsofbooze - January 7, 2012
That's a good one, for sure.
How about the “rim shot”, where you try to bank it off the bathroom mirror? Messy, but highly effective.
5thStarter - January 7, 2012
like I tell my friends
its only messy if you miss
2pintsofbooze - January 7, 2012
Words to live by, sir.
5thStarter - January 8, 2012
By the way, if you don't mind me asking, how did you get your avatar pic?
5thStarter - January 8, 2012
a buddy of mine works in the front office
the day after thanksgiving he is allowed to invite some friends to the field for some BP and fielding. the pic is from 2010, me and another buddy sat at the wall taking pics of one another “robbing” homeruns. it was a great day.
this past year we had our turkey bowl flag football game on the field after BP, it was pretty awesome. the grounds crew sets up a legit 60 yard field in right field with cones, down markers, end zones, the whole shebang. I feel very lucky to be invited to such things.
I know the team does the canned food drive every year which gives the public the same opportunity to have BP and field. you should check it out next time it comes around. Its pretty fun messing around on the field.
2pintsofbooze - January 8, 2012
Wow.
What an amazing opportunity. I might have to check out the canned food drive next year. Especially if Rogelio Chavez is there.
Thanks for sharing.
5thStarter - January 8, 2012
You have my vote
Master DOV
Halos2011champs - January 7, 2012
I feel that i am the 2002 Angels in the playoffs
just glad to be there
no chance of winning
lets see how this ends for me
DAD OF VLAD - January 7, 2012
Go get 'em
GIFSoup
Halos2011champs - January 7, 2012
Dayum!
Mo Vaughn sure let himself go.
sheisalovelyladyandmyapologiestoher - January 7, 2012
Prince Fielder?
mustard_man - January 7, 2012
Rec for the wwe ref
but wag of the finger for choosing THAT guy.
That’s too much T&A for those suspenders to handle.
blast21dave - January 8, 2012
Went w/ DOV
Really, really tough call. Love this whole series (I blame myself for my exclusion) and thank Phi for it, but…the gifs. They just overwhelm your sense of reason and any sanity you have left. When they’re over, there is no other choice but DOV. Also he’s a pretty cool dude, it seems.
Clutch - January 7, 2012
Gotta go for DoV
He is a die hard Halos fan, deep in the land of A’ss.
eyespy - January 7, 2012
He does represent, doesn't he.
red floyd - January 7, 2012
Well it appears DOV is going to win this one...
Can we have a tag team match on Halowood at least? I was really hoping to see what Phi had planned.
Balls and Strikes - January 7, 2012
Me and Halowood joined about the same time
seemed like a cool guy but you got to understand i never really read his post or comments
DAD OF VLAD - January 8, 2012
Hurr-durr
red floyd - January 8, 2012
no sweat man, I was just really interested to see what Phi had in store for him, he had some good battles with him
I suppose he could post it on your behalf though,
Balls and Strikes - January 8, 2012
Tough, tough choice.
yeswecan - January 8, 2012
I'm calling this one a double elimination a la Steve Austin
blast21dave - January 8, 2012
Gotta go with PHI
Always look forward to him laying into the idiot ideas that are posted by the newbies & trolls and he looks like my little bother.
Seik1177 - January 9, 2012
Got to give it up to PhiSlamma
surprised that i won by 20 votes
DAD OF VLAD - January 9, 2012
That's 2.5 Santorums
Commander_Nate - January 9, 2012
I go snowboarding for one weekend
And this is what I come back to?
My oh my.
PhiSlamma - January 9, 2012 via mobile
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