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So you PROMISE to start Wood then, none of this Izturis shit anymore, right Sosh?

Ok, good, now shake on it.

Arte: Hey, coac- Wait. Dude, you have a lasagna stain on your shirt

Sosh: really? F***

or the inverse

SCIOSCIA: Thanks for the Sham-Wow tie Arte, it absorbs lasagna stains so fast that I am eating like a slob without fear again, even when I am all spiffed up like this.
MORENO: Just win, baby, I will order more meatballs…

Yours puts mine to shame
Dude, d'you see that chick with Frank McCourt?

Taa-lent!

They made me an offer I couldnt refuse.

Oh I am sorry ,We didnt make ANY decent offers for Bay,Halladay or Holliday.

Mike: Hey! You would happen to have

Doc Halladay behind you there somewhere, would ya, Arte? Damn…

Sosh: Wait, before I shake your hand...

Arte: Yes Sosh there is gonna be lasagna after every game

Sosh: Yes!

Arte: thanks for meeting me, Mike, this off-season has been great.

We’ve gotten rid of a lot of dead weight (you know, expensive players), and I’ve even managed to up ticket prices. The best part is nobody even ridicules me because of the sham going on across town. Those poor McCourts.

Mike: what about our team? Don’t you want to be competitive?

Arte: Quit talking nonsense, Mike. I went out and got us Matsui. His revenue alone in the Japanese market will bring me millions.

Mike: I understand you’re going to be rich this season, but don’t you want your team to compete?

Arte: two words for you: Fernando Rodney.

Mike: do you feel at all bad for the fans with the departure of Lackey, Figgins, and Vlad??

Arte: who?

i assure you the angels arent making enough year to year for arte to be "rich" because he MAINTAINED payroll

there are so many more expenses than the average fan knows about.

so please people, enough with this whole “arte is too cheap to be competitive” act. it’s old.

I am fairly sure it was a joke, but...

I tend to think that Arte’s pocket will get a little additional lining in 2010 due to the ASG. Maybe I assume wrong?

Which then gives more $$$$ for the likes of the next free agent class...

We hope…

You are aware, are you not, that Arte has

1) gained about $260 million in equity since 2003;
2) swung his operating income from -$38 mill in his first three years to a +$36 mill over the next 3;
3) increased his gate receipts in that same time by $22 mill per year while reducing his debt ratio by 30%;
4) realized $1.4 billion in revenue, with 2008 alone being $212 mill, an $85 mill increase over 2003;
5) meanwhile, after bumping payroll in 2004, he has held payroll to roughly the same 10% range ever since?

I am not saying the guy is cheap, but he is not stupid, either.

Neat. Be sure to add all those nifty little notes in your caption.
Mike: Que pasa, Arte, mi amigo
Mike: Que pasa, Arte, mi amigo
ah, screwed that up--nevermind

the kids jumped me, damn them
I will have revenge…

Sometimes child-abuse is a necessary evil.

Go show those kids who is in charge!

mmhmm

equity doesnt pay bills or sign checks, but it’s nice that fans think Arte should lose money on player payroll because he has perceived gains in value.

citing revenues without citing expenses is pointless. As is foregoing figures from 2009 when we are talking about 2010.

my point was that people crying their hearts out over the club maintaining the same payroll figure as the 2009 season is beyond stupid. Call me crazy, but I’m content to have a top 5ish payroll. I haven’t forgotten life before Arte like everyone else apparently has.

I am using Forbes data.

The only expenses they provide are player expenses, which include more than just payroll. I did quote them. If you want the details,
2003 = $89 mill
2004 = $122 mill
2005 = $111 mill
2006 = $112 mill
2007 = $119 mill
2008 = $132 mill
There. I quoted expenses in detail. Note they match my statement “meanwhile, after bumping payroll in 2004, he has held payroll to roughly the same 10% range ever since”.

And the reason I am not quoting 2009 figures is because Forbes will not publish those until April. When they do, I will be back.

Other points:
- Unless you are his accountant, you have no idea that Arte is, or would, lose any money at any level of payroll. You are making that whole thing up out of thin air.
- Not knowing that he does, but Arte could easily mortgage that equity and incur debt to pay any expenses. And he can pay those expenses by check if he wishes.
- Including 2009 through 2013, the Halos payroll commitment ranks, as of right now, 7th, 9th, 9th, 8th and 19th.
- Finally, holding payroll at an absolute value over time is actually a DECREASE in payroll, due to inflation. The downturn in the outer economy did not eradicate inflation.

Mike: "After this offseason, I cannot even look you in the eye when I shake your hand"
Arte: Good to see you Mike

Mike: That CANNOT be Tiger Woods over there in the bushes with that jackrabbit.

Ugh. You beat me to the Tiger Wood reference. Oh well...

Hey Mike, is this handshake really a part of becoming "made’?

Yeah boss…it’s a part of the process.

Glad I remembered the shades.

Yeah, it’s best to conceal any hint of fear.

Fear? I just got "made"! I didn’t have any fear?

Uh…no boss…that was the meal before the…uh…"ceremony".

You mean…there’s more?

Yup.

I’m not "made" yet?

Nope.

Is DeNiro a part of the next…phase…and does it involve a…baseball bat?

I guess we’ll find out. You’re not untouchable.

Is that the tree Tiger ran into?

Nah! That’s in Florida.

Nerves…I think I’ll keep the shades on…for now.

Good idea.

Ah crap. Caption, not conversation. I f****d up.

“Mike Scioscia, manager of the LAA of A greets Arte Moreno, owner of the LAA of A after the first meeting of ‘The Curtis Granderson Fan Club’ held in Paradise Valley, AZ.”

Oh boy! Oh boy! A Curtis Granderson FAN CLUB! WHERE DO I SIGN UP??
Do you think we can still get him even from the Yankees?

And if so, who do you think it would take? I think we could give them Robb Quinlan and John Lackey, and maybe throw in Brendan Woods and Irving Santana, too! Come on Tony, make it happen!

Arte: See Mike, not spending any money on free agents got us these sharps suits.

Mike: Lasagna?

Arte: I just ate the last of the lasagna... and no I didn't save you any

Sosh: Wait what? You bastard!

“Arte, quick, grab my hand! We gotta get outta here. I see Curt Pringle and he still looks kinda pissed. Besides, the buffet just opened.”

Haha

I went to highschool with Curt’s daughter.

I asked, he can’t get free tickets.

The city has tons of seats

He lied.

This is true.

My sister-in-law and her mother worked for the city and camped in those seats. Of course, they got into a little trouble over embezzling, but that is another story…

I sit in them all the time myself
Yeah

I figured he just didn’t want all of my buddies and myself hounding his daughter for tickets.

Mike, I lost my ass in the market this past year, and my properties have gone to shit,

so thanks for the $100 loan.

Giving it a shot.

Mike: Hey Arte, good to see you…did you hear something?

Arte: Just the sabermetric community underestimating us again.

Good god the comments in that are terrible
i said it before and i will say it again

Baseball Prjection nerds would kill themselves if they knew how similar their chat posts sounded to discussions in astrology forecasting chat rooms.

It is a good thing they are not gamblers
Hey Godfather, let me ask a favor...
MIKE: Hi Arte--Ah, CRAP!!!--look out behind you!--

ARTE: Huh?!

MIKE: It’s that damn Rev Hellfan guy tryin’ to get another picture with me for that freakin’ blog of his!

ARTE: Madre mia! Look at the hair on him!

(Sorry, rev, couldn’t resist :) …..but great post concept, bro)

Moreno: "Hey Mike...pull my finger."

Scioscia: “He’s my boss I guess I have to fall for this old joke again.”

You stole mine

Is it bad that Pull my finger is the first thing I thought of?

Hey, thanks for f@#$ing me Arte.

Arte: Well sorry So-
Mike: No seriously, how many times in a row do you want me to win manager of the year?

Arte-"So we're in agreement?"

“I allow you to keep Maicer Izturis on the field, while not playing Brandon Wood, you keep those naked pictures of me on the down low.”

OMG! Look out behind You!! Its the FuenteRodneysoarus-wreck!
Wow, the fans are screaming bloody murder....

We swept the Sox and won 97 games and they still dont think we know what were doing? They are becoming more like Yankee fans every day.

"Hey Mike! Wazzap!!!"

“Faint”

"Wait, is that your eating hand or your wiping hand?"
It looks like some mafia meeting.
Hence my Godfather quote above.
Moreno happy he didn't buy the Pirates.

No more yellow ties for Scioscia.

Arte: If they only knew what i have up my sleeve....

MIkey: Hope so, because HH fans are pretty upset we haven’t done anything!!!

Arte: "Nice to meet you, Mr. Limbaugh."
"Would you like a chocolate pretzel?"
They're a little melty but damn are they exsquisite.
Uh Arte... why is that wrecking ball tearing down the stadium?

and now you want us to play at a Little League field in downtown Los Angeles?

Manager and Owner finalize the process of becoming BFFs (Best Friends Forever)

The formal handshake (pictured) officially initiates the bond, the highest social bond between two individuals recognized by the US legal system.

The deal ensures that in the event of Moreno’s death, Scioscia would inherit his Sony PSP. Moreno would inherit Scioscia’s secret lasagna recipe if he passed away.

Though not visible, the matching half-heart necklaces are believed to be worn discreetly under both men’s shirts.

Hey Cartman

At least give credit where its due!

Well it's not a very good game

If I just lay out the references without people getting a chance to guess now is it?

Jeez…

"Paper."

“Paper.”

“Tie.”

Don't look now Arte,

But that jerk from Lookout Landing that followed us here is naked up in that tree behind you.
vr, Xei

Los Angeles Angels owner Arte Moreno, left, a known practical joker, prepares to use a “joy buzzer” while a naked Tony Reagins distracts his manager Mike Scioscia, right, following meetings with baseball owners and general managers Thursday, Jan. 14, 2010, in Paradise Valley, Ariz. (AP Photo/Paul Connors)

I gotta hand it to you Mr. Scioscia...

jew got everything a man could want.

I Win...

Mike: Hey Arte what’s with the glasses?
Arte: The glare off of your blad head is killing me.
Mike: Sorry Sir…
Arte: No worries… Bosley is a sponser again this year… I’ll hook you up!

It is done Capo...

…Figgins is gone, he sleeps with the Fishers

Mike: Hey Boss, thanks for the great offseason, asshole !

Arte: You can’t handle the truth !

Hey Arte, remember Eckstein?

He was about this tall. Seriously, he barely came up to my waist.

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